Stay lost, Ulysses
January 23, 2010 § 1 Comment
Penelope, I know you’re out there. Give up the weaving already! Here, take my red shoes. I always get lucky in them and I think they’re just what you need. Stop this nonsense of waiting for a husband who’s taken 20 years to get back home to you. You’re giving us women a bad name, making it virtuous to wait by the phone, wait for a man who’s never there anyway. Besides, Ulysses has probably grown bald and paunchy by now. Find yourself someone 8 to 10 years younger than you. It’s . . . er . . . rejuvenating. Oh, and by the way, shrouds are so ancient history.